A Sunday Afternoon

Oh the joys of being "grown up." I paid my first rent bill yesterday and thought about the sadness that I'll be doing this the rest of my life. It's an interesting concept to me. I pay to live and yet life is free. Well, minus the bill to the OBGYN and the hospital. I am starting to understand more and more that our world really does revolve around money. Obviously human, I grasped the concept of money at a young age but to be on my own now, totally different perspective. Although we can't get away from the hold money has on us, we can definitely control it. I don't understand how having lots of money is a good thing. It is my opinion that when one has lots of money it is easier to take things for granted and not show appreciation for them. I can only speak about my own experiences, but when I was a pre-teen I remember mom scolding me for throwing around my toys and not taking care of my stuff because I thought that she would just go out and buy another one. As I got older and when especially when dad left ,and money was hard to come by, I started taking care of my stuff. Anything from clothes to my toothbrush because I knew we were broke. I appreciated my things a lot more. When I was in high school I remember thinking my sister was so cool because whatever I needed she would buy me. Missy had an endless amount of money. She is still well off, don't get me wrong. But rather than idolizing her, I feel sorry for her. The grip that money has on her is sad. Obviously she's not the only one that is serving the master of money. All you have to do is take a look around your world. Countless amounts of people have a very unhealthy love for money. I'm not saying money is bad or we need to protest against the use of it. I am making the point that re-evaluating the control you are allowing the green stuff to have is imperative. I struggle with it and there have been times I have analyzed it and needed to shift my priorities. I urge you to do the same and take the time to evaluate your priorities and make the necessary changes. 

I apologize for the late blogging and not keeping you updated in my life. It's been crazy these past few weeks. I've been in the process of moving into an apartment...eh moving. I vow never to move until I get married, and even then he should be open to moving in with me. I have most of my stuff here at the apartment but still have to go back to the dorms today to clean and get the rest of my stuff. In which I am seriously contemplating throwing away. I started this moving process last week and will finally be in by this weekend, crazy right? I assure you it's not because I am that slow. As I said earlier, last week was nuts. I graduated a week ago! I still can't believe that I am a college grad. All the glory goes to God because it was He who got me through this. Anyway OK so graduation, as you can imagine it's stressful to graduate. There are a thousand things going on in order for one to walk across the stage. Like calling in and pronouncing your name, turning in a thousand papers to the records office, oh yeah and trying to round up the family! Graduation day finally arrived and that day was nuts. A few of my family members were supposed to be at my apartment with my bedroom furniture at 9, they did not show up until 12. Yep....that's right they were three hours late. But despite all the running around and stress we got it done and I was on time to the arena. 

The next day my grandpa called me to say that one of my aunts died that morning. Friday and Saturday was a weekend home. Along with Sunday being my graduation party and I had to speak at a church back home because I'm going to Armenia in September and need support. I stayed with my uncle Tim and aunt Rebecca last weekend and it was a lot of fun. Aunt Rebecca was really busy but I got to hang out with Timmy all weekend and I really enjoyed it. He spoiled me, lol. I also went to a book sale and got a lot of really interesting books that I'm so eager to read. That's what I want to do this summer in celebration of being a college grad...finally reading what I want to read. I've been reading a book about Mary Tudor, the bloody Mary girl. And let me tell ya...wow she was an interesting person along with her father. 

In honor of the storm that is happening right now, literally and not figuratively, a good song for the week would be one by Todd Agnew, Grace like Rain. If you're not familiar with Agnew, I suggest that you download a few songs by him. Some of my favorites include the Martyrs Song, Better Question, and Grace like Rain. 

On a side note...this guy on the food channel is an odd one. Enjoy your weekend and again I am really sorry for not being on top of this blog like I should have been. 

Fried Green Tomatoes

First and foremost, Happy Easter everyone! In Laue of the respective Holiday, here's a little history. Oh don't worry, I'm not going to bore you with the history of the Easter Bunny (although I did google it) or the Easter eggs, or any of the other silly stuff. Actually I searched YouTube for a John Piper video on the Resurrection....didn't find one. But I do subscribe to his blog and bookmarked his website, therefore here is the link to the sermon notes from last year's Easter Sunday sermon. 

http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Sermons/ByOccasion/4/2694_The_God_of_Peace_Brought_from_the_Dead_the_Good_Shepherd/

To be honest, I'm not quite sure what to type in this white box. I know that my font is messed up right now but I can't seem to fix it. That sounds so silly to blog about. It's been a rough week. I had a fight with my best friend and we still haven't seemed to resolve the issue. Frankly, I don't know if we will. Maybe it's one of those move one arguments, ya know? The kind that you bicker about for a few hours, maybe a few days, (in our case, a few months), and although you both know neither one is happy, you don't do anything to fix it. Not that you just refuse to but outside circumstances seem to prevent it or maybe you just don't want to. Heck, I don't know. I am the type of person that when I see a problem I want to fix it. Well, I can't fix this one and let me tell you, it's frustrating! I am learning patience through this though, that I am certain of. Sorry, I didn't want to spill that out on the Internet where everyone and their dog can read this but I'm sure someone out there in cyber space can relate, right? 

New topic:

Tomorrow after church I'm going to my sister's house where the rest of my siblings will be, along with my mom. That should be fun, I'm looking forward to a salad my sister makes. We aren't certain what the name of it is so we call it "The Ugly Salad", charming right, haha. Whenever she is generous enough to give me the recipe I'll post it so you all can enjoy it. I'll be knocking out two birds with one stone though, spending that quality time with the family and working on graduation invitations...yikes! And the count down begins...G-day minus 16 days, or however that is said :) I'm really excited to be moving in the apartment though! And my roommate is going to be amazing. But I am still looking for a full time job, or another part time job. Whatever I can get at this point. I'm pretty sure I've applied or inquired about a job at about 20 places now. This is like fishing...but I like to fish. I don't like this. Anyone know of a business hiring??? Hello anyone? I hear crickets...not a good sign. Wow God is really teaching me to lean on Him and to trust Him with everything. I have trust issues though, doesn't He understand this? I know it sounds like I'm talking to myself right...OK so I am just a little. But I saw a diagram a few weeks ago and I really wish there was a drawing option on here bc I would love to post it. However, the point of it was that you have your comfort zone and everything else is outside of that. How true! That is where you are sensitive to God's working in your life, definitely NOT in your comfort zone. I'm learning that...slowly I assure you.  I had a verse I was going to put in this space, but I completely blanked out. Wow, more tired than I thought. OK I have to go to bed now otherwise I will be worthless tomorrow. Good night! Oh yeah...the song the song, I'm sorry I almost forgot~Embracing Accusations by Shane and Shane, warning though...it's a slap in the face. OK Good night again :)

Say no to dresses!

Old Jeans are the Best

I don't necessarily dress to impress people, I dress for the occasion. For example, if I'm just hanging out with friends then it's jeans and a T-shirt. However, if I'm going somewhere nice then I will dress appropriately. When the occasion arises, I usually wear dress pants and nice shirt or a skirt. I try to stay away from dresses. Those are the times I tend to use make up as well.

I bought a journal this week for a few reasons however, this is no ordinary journal. The title is "Wreck this Journal" and the author is Keri Smith. On every page there are instructions for what to do to the page. Instructions like, burn this page, a page for circles, take the journal in the shower with you, go on a walk and drag the journal, etc. I have only done a few pages and nothing too destructive, yet. The authors website is kerismith.com and I would encourage you to check it out. There are also other activities available on the website. I warn you though, if you do decide engage in this activity, people will give you funny looks trust me. All in all, it's a great way to pass the time, develop the creative side, and just have some fun with a book (sorta sounds like an oxymoron). Besides having fun with it, another reason I wanted to buy it was to blog about all the things I'm doing to this book. As silly as it sounds, I bet it's going to be very therapeutic. So far I have covered a page with office supplies, paper clips, tape, post-it notes, and a thumb tack. I have colored on the outside edges of the book, and tried to connect dotes on a page from memory. 

Therefore, because of this journal and how random the instructions are, the song of the week has to be a goofy song. That is why I'm picking Muchkinland Musical Sequence (Ding dong the wicked witch is dead). If you don't know what movie that is from I'm not going to tell you. Instead I'm going to laugh at you. Have a good week!

Really? Pokerface? Why?

These may be the only songs i don't like.

Pokerface by lady gaga

it's the same phrase for 3 minutes. and with a name like lady gaga...honestly can you expect good music to come out of that?

harder to breathe by maroon 5

Have you every heard a song that you just know you're not going to like but you listen to it anyway and then by the end of the song, your suspicion was correct? It's this song.

this love by maroon 5

WAY over played

Read the internet

I usually look at my homepage, which is Google, to see any interesting news stories and then follow that up with a gander to foxnews.com. However, I always look at the weather sometimes 3-4 times a day.

mmm, raw fish

I Miss Japanese Food by roybuloy

After a new found interest in Japanese food, I would have to say that I think I could eat it for a year. I love sushi and rice is starting to grow on me. However, eating it for a year may be over kill but I'm willing to try it!

Medium, coffee, anywhere

Usually I do well with change. I am not one of those people who get all bent out of shape and have a bad attitude about it. I realize that everything in this world changes. However, sometimes change is hard to adapt to. I'm sure I'm not the only person in the world that has experienced this. For instance, when my parents divorced it was really hard for me adjust. I took on a lot of responsibility, more than I needed to at 13 years of age. And a few years later I found myself being kicked out of my father's house, that was a hard circumstance to embrace. Moving from the country to the city for school, that was really tough for me. I had to learn where everything was. I had to teach myself how to properly drive on the interstate and the purpose of a stoplight. As crazy as this sounds, there was not one stoplight in my entire county. I've experienced change that I did not like.

 Even the dynamics of relationships change and sometimes it's a beautiful thing. Other times, well it's a not so beautiful thing. When my parents broke up, there was a change in the relationship. Not only theirs but, all of ours. Adam and I looked at dad differently. I had a different opinion of my mom. Adam and I grew closer. Even the relationships with our extended family changed due to the divorce. Although Adam and I are still very close, my relationship with my mom is still rocky. Dad and I have no relationship and some of my extended family will never get it. 

As graduation approaches at a 100 miles an hour, I am reminded that soon everything will change. I will officially be on my own, have bills, be expected to be an adult, and everything else that comes with it. While I am excited to experience this new chapter of my life, I am utterly terrified. I'm scared because I don't know what to expect. I am reminded everyday via news, the job market is not doing so well. That's just what I want to hear! I've put in so many resumes and have been online for hours looking for jobs. It's depressing. Sometimes I wish I could just go back to the time I was in elementary school. When coloring in the lines meant getting an A, nap time was required, recess three times a day, and where getting married was a fairytale. Oh those where the days! It's hard to believe that 23 years have gone by so fast. 

With all the changes that are weeks away, I just want to run and hide from time. But knowing that is pretty much impossible, I have to get over my fears and realize this will get easier. 

OK so now on to the song for the week, right? With all the change taking place I thought it would be good to have a song that counteracts that. Something that would just relax and remind me that I am not in control but that I serve a God that is. Therefore, the song of the week (the suspense is killing you I know ;) is...God of all Glory by Jeremy Riddle. If you are unfamiliar with Riddle, may I suggest that you stop living under that rock and check him out! 

Sorry for the abrupt ending but I must rush outta here, I have class that I'm almost late for. 

Sorry for the late post, it's been an interesting week. I finally went to the doctor and have an infection in my bronchial tubes. Happy moment right? But I must say that without the help and love of the people of God I would not have found that out. I don't have health insurance therefore, going to the doctor isn't an option for me. A couple from my church paid for my visit and medicine and I will be forever grateful for their service. That was the beautiful end to a horrendous beginning. I missed most of my classes because I was sick with a fever, aches, coughing, no voice but, it's all better now! Thanks to the medicine and the great people that provided it for me :) 

I was out with a friend today and while we were gathering things for an event we were discussing the difficulty of finding a job with the economy the way it is. She was telling me that sometimes all she can do is review Psalm 9:10, "And those who know your name put their trust in you for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you." We put our trust in God because He is worthy. God has not forsaken us, therefore we can trust Him. How amazing is that? God will not forsake His people, we must seek Him. Not seeking in the sense of searching for God behind the trees but, seeking Him to know Him better, to live for Him, yearning to be with Him. Easier said than done, right? Who said following God was easy? However, SO worth it! 

For the song of week, I've decided Strawberry Swing by Coldplay. I really like the song because it's easy to bob your head along to, it's the type of song that takes you back to childhood and all the fond memories. Strawberry Swing is also a relaxing, good mood kind of a song. I recommend you check it out. It has a wonderful tempo, tone, beat, etc. 

Again, sorry for the late post but I hope that you enjoyed reading a shorter one this week :) And please, check out the songs. If you don't like them, tell me why. If you do like them, tell me why. I like getting feedback. Have a fabulous week and remember that we can trust God because He will not forsake us. 

My Series of Unfortunate Events...

Before I get to the song of the week, please allow me to vent a bit. The previous week was Spring Break. For most people this is an exciting time to make plans and get away, go on some crazy adventure, make lasting memories, etc. Oh don't worry, there were crazy adventures and lasting memories I assure you. However, not the kind of memories and stories I would have hoped to blog about.

It started like this: Monday was a pretty easy going day. I went to work and did my daily routine there. Two of my friends stayed in the dorms during break and we had made plans to cook dinner and watch a movie, ya know just take it easy. Which is what we did, it was wonderful. Hannah made a great dinner and we had fun watching the plethora of movies. And then it happened at 3 in the morning. Don't worry I will spare you the details. I woke up with an odd feeling, ya know the one that says, "Oh no, where's the bathroom!" Yep, that's right friends, I got sick. So after cleaning that mess up it's about 4 in the morning and I have to be at work at 9. I get to work stay for the staff meeting and go home. When I arrived at my humble abode I had spiked a fever and had the chills. Mind you, I haven't had food in over 12 hours and I am in no way going to eat. Wednesday begins with me in bed and ends with me in bed. The next day I'm feeling better, so I go to work. I worked all day and felt fine. Friday I wake up and I'm feeling a little under the weather but not to worry, nothing like Monday. Here it is Sunday night and I have a fever of 101.2, sore throat, coughing and surprised my lungs are still inside where they belong, oh and did I mention I can't talk? I sound like a 4 year old girl according to a couple of people. 

In case you were wondering, I did not get any of my goals accomplished. However, I did find an interesting Sushi place. Oh and that's a story in itself.  Oh yeah, Sarah and I went to the Cupcakery, and yet another story. Ready? (sorry this is going to be a longer blog.)

Aimee, Hannah and I decide that I am feeling better and we need something to do. I've been cooped up in this dorm for too long. Sushi sounds good, right? On our way to the restaurant, Hannah is consistently telling me this is the wrong one, we need to turn around, this area doesn't look right. Being my stiff-necked self, I told her I knew what I was doing, and besides these are the directions off the Internet. We end up downtown in a really bad area of town, after dark. It was a lock the doors and drive straight kinda moment. Hannah calls her cousin and we get to the right restaurant in a hurry. On to the Cupcakery story with Sarah...

My best friend has never been to the Cupcakery in Central West End, shocking! So we head down there for some amazing cupcakes, great atmosphere and, some food! It was a great time. If you haven't experienced the Cupcakery, you are missing out my friend! I got a raspberry one and it was SO good. It had raspberry filling in the middle and a light raspberry icing, yum! We then head to Crepes etc. That was scrumptious and if you have yet to visit that restaurant...you're living under a rock. They have the best food for a decent price too, a college kid's dream :) So after our stomachs are stuffed with goodness we start the journey back home. Sarah and I are roughly 10 mins from home and we get captured by the sobriety checkpoint, oh joy. The wait wasn't so bad and the cop was really nice. But, where I'm from the cops drink with the kids so I was no way prepared. I was driving Sarah's car and had forgotten to grab my licences off the dresser. Of course the police officer is going to ask for that, and he does. As he's asking me for them, I'm coughing up part of my lungs. I think he felt bad for me, because I told him I forgot to grab them and all he says is to remember to take them the next time I'm out. 

In all of this craziness and stressful Spring Break, I have learned to lean on God a little more. I asked for patience and God puts me in these situations to strengthen my character. As trivial as these things are now, they were stressful going through them. I thank God that when I don't understand why this is happening or how long must this continue, He is sovereign. God is in control, and I am grateful for that. Hebrews 2:8 says that God has left nothing out of His control and what a wonderful promise! If I was in control I would mess my life up. Therefore, the song of the week (drum roll please) would have to be Jeremy Camp, Enough. God is more than enough for me, more awesome than I know, and all I have is in God is more than enough. 

So there you have it friends, my ridiculously long blog of the week. I pray that you would lay down your burdens and concerns about the following week and focus on the One who created life. Thank God He's in control and is more than enough for you. He is, after all, the reason you are alive today. 

Pick of the week for this week...Zephyr Song by Red Hot Chili Peppers. With the kick off of Spring Break and the amazing weather we're having, the song fits perfect. This has been a pretty mellow week and the song has a tranquil disposition. The Zephyr Song is a great way to start Spring Break. I have realized that I am not that familiar with the Red Hot Chili Peppers. I have several songs of theirs on my ipod but haven't them much attention, that may change now. 

So with this being the start of Spring Break I have a few goals in mind for the week. The first one is to do all my homework. With graduation rapidly approaching, I find myself having more homework than I realize and want to get that all done before getting too stressed out. The second goal is to shop effectively for the apartment. My brother and sister are going to help me out on that :) Thirdly, I want to discover an interesting place in St. Louis. I've lived here for 3 years now and keep going back to the same locations...I want something different. Then there is always the trivial things like, clean my car, keep my room clean, go through the clothes...but those aren't any fun so why bore you with those details! 

In the midst of all this craziness and stress I want to encourage you to not lose focus on the one you were created for. It is hard to balance time, work, friends, family and everything else that comes along with life. However, I bid you all to take time and focus on our Creator. God's beauty and sovereignty, love and justice, grace and mercy the list is everlasting. That is my ultimate goal this Spring Break. We were created to worship...let's get busy worshiping! John 4:23 says, "the hour is coming and is now here when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship Him." God wants us to worship Him so what are you waiting for?

New Idea

The purpose of a blog is to keep people updated with what is going on in your head, right? If my definition is correct, and please tell me if I am wrong, I am going to start a project. Before I go into it, I love music, all music. My ipod isn't where I want it but getting there :) I have songs from all ends of the spectrum.With that said; once a week I'm going to pick a song that sums up my week or what goals I have for the next week...that kind of thing. For this past week's pick, Come Away With Me~Norah Jones. Why,  you wonder? Well allow me to tell you why :) It's been a restless week and to be honest, anywhere but here would be nice. I love to drive and explore and be adventurous, it's hard to implement that when I have responsibilities at home. I am physically on campus or at work but mentally, a million miles away. 

Another reason why I chose Norah Jones is, I love the style, tone, color, beat, and variety of Norah Jones. This song calms my nerves and for anyone in Res Life this week has been chaos. When I listened to Come Away With Me, I though of taking off at night with my best friend and seeing where we end up. I love being spontaneous and believe this song offers that. So there you have it my friends...Kelly's pick of the week. Please comment on the post and let me know what you think of my new idea, song suggestions, and that kinda thing.  

~Your new found DJ~

Already?

Graduation is quickly approaching! Although it is a fun and exciting time in life...it is also a very very scary one. I can remember thinking if high school was ever going to end and now I'm clenching to every minute I have left of this semester. Soon I will be living officially on my own...yikes! In high school we had senior wills therefore, my will is the following:

I, Kelly Feltes, will to Sarah Marie Long many road trips, random adventures, thanksgiving with my family, and the honor to call you my best friend. To Peggy and Susie I will a blender at 7:00 in the morning, a box of 50 granola bars still in the package, and the many drives to vent. To Hannah-Joy, the ability to stop being so nice, your license, and someone to take you driving on the interstate, oh yeah and my room :). To Mama Schertz, many shopping trips to Sam's, a semester without drama, and wonderful RA's next year. To Papa Schertz I will, the biggest container of Parmesan cheese, the right to finally brag on the Cubs, and mango spray. To the Hessel's, I will a speeding ticket to the unknown kid, a fire truck, and many alcohol busts. To the women RA's I will you guys the ability to deal with the drama, the wonderful weekend dutys, RAT week, and my mom. To the guy RA's I will you, my mom, a non smelly dorm, and an office that is functional. I will to Adam, a wonderful marriage, a "normal" family life,  a great job so you can take care of me, and the privilege to call you my favorite brother and best friend. To all the residents in North Hall, the ability to put up with your RA :), a wonderful time in college, and friendships that rock your world. Oh and don't forget all the great perks about Mobap, like the food. 

To those of you whom I may have forgotten I apologize. But I pray that you live a life glorifying to God and that you will never forget why you are created. As I am ending a chapter and starting a new one, I have come to learn that I really cannot do anything on my own and when I do I mess it all up. I give all the glory to God for getting me through college. I never thought it was possible to obtain a higher education. I thank everyone through the years that had to put up with me. I know that I have been a difficult person at times. A special thanks to those at FBCF for dealing with my ridiculous schedule and loving me in spite of not knowing how to be a secretary. I love all of you guys and pray that God will be glorified through you.